3 Fears of Mine

I generally think of myself as a pretty fearless person.  Given the opportunity, I can charge into any situation with a "fake it till you make it" attitude.  I could move across the country (and I have) and have to make all new friends without batting an eye.  Start a new job?  I'll wow them.  Experiment in the kitchen?  How bad could it be? Have children?  I was born to be a mother.  Have my mother move down the street from me.... well....yikes.  haha.  But then I look at myself from an outside point of view, and I have some pretty intense (and probably pretty irrational) fears.  So here are 3 legitimate fears that I have, in no particular order.

1)  I fear the death of a beloved pet.  When I was a child, when one of my pets died, s/he got a kings burial.  I wore black for a week, and cried for days on end.  My pets weren't just animals, they were some of my best friends.  As I got older, I don't know if it was a conscious act or not, but we'd end up giving our pets away for one reason or another, before they died.  My bird Tweety was given to my vocal coach.  I think it was cause my cats kept trying to scare it to death.  My dog Zodiac ended up living with my mom when I moved out, and she ended up giving it to a family on a farm when she had to move.  My cat Zoey ran away in the middle of one of my moves.  We have 2 cats now, and the thought of finding one of them lifeless terrifies me.  I don't know how I'll be able to hold it together, and especially if Greyson is older, that's going to be especially important.  And if anyone knows Rob, you know that our kitties are more family than pet...lol



2)  Sharks.  Not just in deep ocean water, but mid calf ocean water, ankle deep water, lakes, backyard pools, and ANY body of water in the dark.  If I cant touch the ground and I'm swimming, I hear Jaws music.  I panic!  I love to swim, but you won't catch me in a pool by myself, and snorkeling and especially scuba diving is out of the question.  Totally irrational, and I know in my mind it is completely stupid, but there you go.

3)  Ghosts.  I don't even want to talk about it.  The rational part of my mind says that even if a spirit in this world existed, and hey, ya, they probably do, they can't hurt us, and probably aren't even aware of us.  Then theres that dark part of my mind that pictures them watching from a corner of my house with evil eyes.  Just imagining that anything is there and aware of me and may possibly have sinister thoughts, is terrifying.  I have the eeby jeebies now.  This is why I can't watch horror movies.  Now I need to go watch some stupid sitcom to cleanse my mind of this so I can sleep.  lol

So theres a look into my jumbled mixed up head.  3 of my legitimate, though probably irrational fears.

Comments

  1. I loved the sharks fear. The part of hearing the jaws music. I understand the ghost fear because I kinda can relate.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Okay, #3 is totally me. And yeah, I don't want to talk about it. : )

    ReplyDelete

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